General Quarters

Sunday 1 November 2009

Sketch summary: We learn of Pastor David's organizational skills via the custodians.

Cast:
Custodian 1 - Craige Johnson

Custodian 2 - Jeanne Fox

Credits:
Director - Nina Welding
Author - Nina Welding

Script:

Cleaning church office … Pastor David’s office. There are charts and maybe a little table in the middle with a big map and figurines, like a War Room. Everything is in clean neat piles, orderly.

Custodian #1 enters David’s office, walks over to the Christian and American flags and salutes them. Then he puts on a white glove, swipes a table or desk, shakes head then starts dusting/cleaning. He starts humming and then fully singing “Onward Christian Soldiers.”

Custodian #2 walks in.

Custodian #2

Wow. I’ve never been in Pastor David’s office before.

Custodian #1

Impressive, huh.

Custodian #2

He’s really organized.

Custodian #1

The man’s an organizational genius. Look at this (point to table).

He knows all the soldiers …

Custodian #2

Soldiers?

Custodian #1

You know, he’s kind of like a general, organizing the troops, making

sure they have the supplies they need when they need them, and helping

them define a strategy …

Custodian #2

A strategy?

Custodian #1

Every army has a strategy. You know, a plan.

Custodian #2

A plan?

Custodian #1

You know “Like a might army moves the church of God.” (while Custodian #1 is talking Custodian #2 eyes table and picks up one of the “soldiers,” dust it and put it back)

Custodian #1

Hey, is that in the same place?

Custodian #2

I guess.

Custodian #1

No guessing, this isn’t a game you know. This is effects based

operations, right here.

Custodian #2

(adjust it a bit) Ok. You know, you’ve got this covered, so I’m going to go clean Pastor John’s office. I’ll check back when I’m done with that. (Custodian #2 exits)

Custodian #1

Roger Wilco. (Custodian #1 starts cleaning and singing again.) “Like a mighty army moves the church of God; brothers, we are treading where the saints have trod. We are not divided, all one body we … ”

Custodian #1 freezes and

LIGHTS OUT